The most impact on me were the changes that started in myself last year. Feeling out of touch with who I was as a person, as a woman. I unexpectedly discovered that I was buried beneath layers of life and time. As the layers of rubble were lay aside I begin to recognize and remember the me hidden beneath. I took her out, dusted her off, and integrated her into my current life.
Pete was astounded, startled, enthralled, exasperated and confused as he began at the same time to see both the girl he had married, and a woman he had never knew, emerge from within me. Delighted and sometimes disgusted. But never one to be outdone, he has overall rose to the occasion with some particularly spectacular changes in himself and how he relates to me. I find him to be the boy I married and the man I always dreamed of rolled into one.
Then the holidays came marching around. Over the past 10 years those have been changing for us, as well. As our elders aged and then passed on leaving less glue to bind the family together for calendar events we had begun a new tradition of Thanksgiving dinner in the deer camp. But not belonging to a lease this year, that tradition was soundly driven to the scrap heap. Fortunately for us, a dear couple who have been friends of ours for years invited us to join in their Thanksgiving. It was a wonderful way to spend the holiday without the reminders of what was lost and gone because it was so new and different for us.
We were invited to make it our new tradition, and God willing, it's one we look forward to establishing.
Next, Christmas time was upon us. And it seemed destined that things change there as well. We had always done an evening meal with my sister and her grown daughters and their families, usually on Christmas Eve. But this year a trip to Arkansas to visit with the other side of the family for one and a trip to Colorado for the other brought that tradition to a halt. While a part of me missed actually chatting and hugging and seeing faces I see all too seldom, I also embraced the chance for a slow, easy Christmas Eve with my little family together at home. We wrapped presents, had pizza for supper, watched the tree and TV together and each helped ourselves to one present.
So as this year draws to a close, I remind you all that change can be a good thing. It is mostly in how you choose to look at it. What you are willing to do with it.
Bubba always rips every CD he gets his hands on to the computer. One day, while Pete was perusing the recently added songs he stumbled upon the song below. He played it for me when I got home. It sums up this past year perfectly. And it is my motto I am carrying into the new year.
These Are The Good Ole Days
(James Otto / Shannon Lawson)
I’m wastin’ half of my life just lookin’ back
Thinkin’ all of my good times were in the past
Ain’t no joy to be found livin’ life like that
I couldn’t feel the sunshine on my face
Everywhere that I’d go I’d feel out of place
Finally figured out I’d never win that race
Now I’m amazed to find
These are the good ole days that we’ve been livin’
No more lookin’ back all is forgivin’
Ain’t gonna live my life through no picture frame
These are the good ole days
Seems like people get lost talkin’ ’bout some day
Something better will come and take them away
Never realize ’til it’s too late
It’s the simple things that make life worthwhile
Like a warm summer day or a laughin’ child
Or how it makes me feel just to see you smile
Baby you know it’s true